How to be a Nicer Person: You attract the energy that you put out
People make a lot of assumptions about me. I’ve heard it all. Many of my close friends have actually told me their first impressions of me and it’s usually the same: an intimidating bitch. I’ve seen how I look just sitting or walking around, and the RBF is so real. That literally is just my face, though. My family has not failed to remind me that I was always an angry kid. My face, since day one, has had an RBF, and I’m not even exaggerating.
This is one of the reasons why I wanted to start my blog; a lot of people don’t really know me. It’s not a big deal, but I’m at a point where I want people to start to know a little bit about me. I feel like a lot of people think they know me based on assumptions or social media, but let’s be real, there’s more to a person behind the screen.
Social media is so deceptive and it’s something we should keep in mind. I remember discussing this in one of my communication classes. One of our discussion posts was to post a screenshot of one of our social media profiles and explain what people may perceive and if it’s true or not. I think it’s a given that people post only what they want to post, but I think we often forget that. That discussion forced me to self-reflect and with that, came a lot of realizations.
My social media is deceptive in many ways. I can come off as a bitch or a whore or a slut based on appearance, which in itself is very problematic. However, I thought I’d just say it because I know people are thinking it. Though I just called myself that, I don’t want anyone to call me that or think that. It’s crazy because I’m far from it- just because I dress a certain way or look a certain way doesn’t give anyone else the right to judge me before knowing me. That goes with anyone, judging people based on appearances isn’t very productive. The way I present myself on social media is myself, but only a very small part of me.
Though I dress and look the way I do, I am actually the weirdest and lowkey nerdiest person you’d ever meet if you really knew me. The middle school in me is definitely still there and she’s a weirdo, but she’s thriving. My family would undoubtedly back me up on this because first of all, bitch, have you heard my laugh? I feel like you don’t truly know me unless you’ve heard my real laugh.
I like to mention my family in this because I dress exactly how I want to in front of them, care and judgment free. It’s funny to think because I’ve heard “you wear that in front of your family?” from other people and I just forget that some people have to conserve themselves, but I love my family for their love and acceptance. I can dress however the fuck I want because they know that doesn’t define me. I’m, first of all, weird as fuck, so they know I’m not doing any crazy ass shit. I mean, they do, but they know me. They know that I’m a very intelligent and bad-ass woman, so even if they had something to say, it wouldn’t phase me. They make fun of me a lot, talking about “where’s the rest of your shirt”, but, let’s be real, I’m not going to change. My grandparents even like to tease me, but it’s just all out of fun and love.
I’m so much more than what I post and that’s what I want people to know. I am a very intelligent, driven, and bad-ass woman. I love learning, expanding my knowledge, and just trying new things. Not to suck my own tit, but I feel like I am a very nice person, I honestly am such a bubbly and positive person that when people think I’m mean I actually get a little offended. Despite that, I’m actually extremely shy and awkward. Unless you’ve met me intoxicated, I’d be very quiet, which is where my “bitchiness” can come off; it just takes a while for me to get comfortable with people. As time goes by and I get older, I want this to change; I want to put myself out there more and allow people to know me because I have way more to offer than what’s presented.
It’s funny because I’ve noticed that everyone I’m close with is the exact opposite of myself. I am such an introvert, but the people I’m close with are extroverts and social butterflies. I think that’s also what’s a little confusing about my own personality because my close friends have grand personalities. I’m unsure how this happens but it’s probably because behind my hard-looking, bitchy exterior, is this weird, crazy, fun-ass bitch and once you get to know me or even just talk to me, you’d realize this.
Though I said assumptions don’t bother me, it can come to a breaking point. This happens a lot at school, especially. When I first started college, I thought I knew the type of friends that I would want. There were many times where I tried to wave or smile at someone, and they completely ignored me. In my head, I sort of knew they made assumptions about me and I became this bitch that people painted me to be. However, I never thought I was; I was trying to make friends by waving and smiling to others, and just to be nice. Other people just didn’t want to be friendly back and I just had to accept that. This definitely goes both ways, though. I am not saying I haven’t done this, but this is where I had to learn. Once I got to know more and more people- people who were willing to actually give me the benefit of the doubt- my assumptions stopped and I feel like I developed a lot more great friendships.
We have to remember that social media is only a small part of our lives. It’s what we want to show. I know how I present myself, and with that, comes judgment and assumptions. But I know that I’m just an awkward, shy, kind girl and as long as I know who I am, it doesn’t matter what anyone else thinks. Let’s refrain from judging people solely on appearance and get to actually know them; you never know who you’ll meet.
xoxo,
kaels
too bad ain’t me<3
RELATED POSTS:
